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Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Who's "My Copper?"

I just had to explain a few things. I’ve only posted a couple of times to this blog, so before I go too far, I need to clarify a bit.

A friend told me she read my blog and it took her a little while to figure out who “My Copper” was. Since she is a pretty smart cookie, mmmm cookies. Sorry, got distracted there for a minute. I thought I would explain before anyone else gets confused.

I started this blog to write. I love to write almost as much as I love to talk. For those of you that know me…hard to believe isn’t it? I do tend to talk quite a bit. Although I am not a big techy, I know that anyone with access to the internet can view my blog. This would be reason number 2 for starting a blog – FAME. Yup, someday I will be famous for writing about the sometimes mundane, sometimes funny, sometimes unbelievable things that happen to me or around me. And, ooh, a pig just flew past my window.

So, back to My Copper. For my friends and family, you all know who he is. He is the man I married, the man I love, the father of my wascally wabbits, the man that served this country, and the man that might write you a speeding ticket. You can try using my name, but it probably won’t get you anywhere. Yes, my husband is a police officer or cop. Did the light bulb just go on? Cop. Copper. Get it? I am keeping him anonymous, so that he does not have a plethora of people asking him for a break while going 50 mph in a 30 mph zone. Well, at least the plethora of people reading this blog.

The kids, well, they will pretty much remain anonymous as well. My oldest son will be My Oldest Son, my daughter will be My Girl, and my baby boy will be My Little Guy. As for our pets, they won’t be anonymous. Kalani is our, now deceased, Golden Retriever; Brutus is our crazy goat-dog. He’s really a Belgian Malinois, but given the chance would eat anything available. We don’t give him the chance. Marshmallow is My Girl’s lop-eared bunny who is the color of a toasted marshmallow. Here’s a fact: Bunnies do not smell like toasted marshmallows. And, last and definitely least, is Buster. Ahhh, Buster.

Buster is the goldfish won by My Girl at the fair last August. You know those fish that usually last a week or two if you’re lucky. Thanks, Grandpa, for letting her play that game five months ago. She named him Buster because she said he was all “busted up.” This leads me to surmise that these wonderful feeder fish that you can purchase at Wal-Mart for 10 cents are somehow sold off to Carnies when they either aren’t selling or are ready to go belly up.

Think about it…it’s a great money making opportunity. Wal-Mart, who I am sure really owns all the traveling carnivals (see www.peopleofwalmart.com for proof), takes all of these fish and charges $3 for each child willing to take a turn at winning a fish while their parents’ backs are turned.

Now, if the child wins, they make a profit of $2.15. $3 a turn, minus 10 cents for the fish, minus 75 cents for the Carny’s pay. This, of course, is based on 10 kids playing and winning per hour to equal Carny pay of $7.50 an hour. Seriously, Carnies should be paid more than that for standing there and listening to all those kids whining for the chance to throw a ping pong ball at a glass fish bowl. But, when I think about it, where else can you be get paid to be outside smoking a cigarette while talking on your cell phone? Try every office building around!

All I wanted to do was clarify why my husband is “My Copper,” and look what we ended up with…Carnies!

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